Everyday is a Winding Road


I had originally planned to use Yazz’s ‘The Only Way is Up’ for this blogpost, however this week it was clear that Sheryl Crow’s ‘Everyday is a Winding Road’ was more appropriate.  Overall, I’ve had a great couple of weeks.  The day before my last chemo I testified before the government’s BEIS (Dept. For Business, Energy & Industrial Strategy) Committee on the Gender Pay Gap, which was not as scary as I had anticipated – and the feedback was good.  I then had a brilliant final chemo salon on the 18th April with good friends, soup, bread and chocolate brownies.  It was followed by some great weather and a really nice PMP Well-being day at Basingstoke after I got my pump disconnected on the Friday.  Fantastic to meet others with the rare disease and to see how well they are all doing.  It’s a really supportive group.  I then had a fab visit and lunch with Joanna and Christy from Nova Scotia and Madelaine on the Saturday and I was feeling great and ready to get back to normal.  However, I was a bit shocked when I went for a 6.5km dog walk on Sunday and was a bit slow and short of breath.  Not what I had expected!  I thought I was still in good shape – but that is one of the side effects of chemo

Annoyingly this final chemo really knocked the wind out of my sails and I spent Tuesday and Wednesday being violently ill at home, having attempted to go into work both days.   I missed some great events and was gutted to be slowed down, but Trend and various friends reminded me that I had just finished a 12 cycle full-on dose of poison and I needed to accept that there would be some impact and that I should rest and recover.  I am definitely not a good patient and not good at taking it easy.  Happily I was better by Thursday and on the 5:50am train to London for a full day which ended with Fiona Murden’s book launch (Defining You) for which I wrote the forward.

I have been a bit slow this weekend and enjoyed a visit from Jeanette who was over from Canada.  Fortunately, I haven’t been ill since Wednesday, but I have definitely been a bit more tired in the evenings.  I am on the road to recovery, but I need to remind myself that there may be ups and downs along the way and I have to adjust for the downs and not have such high expectations of myself – even Wonder Woman must have some off days!

Wednesday is my PET and CT scan and then we see my oncologist Thursday – I’ll write an update after that meeting.

Still feeling upbeat and positive and while I will miss the social aspect of the chemo salons and the lovely Healthcare at Home nurses, I am so pleased not to be having chemo next Wed.  I will plan for a post chemo salon barbecue in June (we shouldn’t need chemo as an excuse to get together).

‘Everyday is a winding road

I get a little bit closer

Everyday is a faded sign

I get a little bit closer to feeling fine’

6 thoughts on “Everyday is a Winding Road

  1. Great blog Bren. You have come a long way and have done extremely well through everything. I am so proud of you!! Your support group, family and friends have been so devouted and wonderful. Thank you to everyone. It has meant a great deal to me for your love and support especially since I am so far away. I am glad that you are listening to your body Bren and realize that you must ease up on yourself and rest more. Unfortunately, there will be bad days along with the good. We all hope more good days. I will always be here for you, Trend, Teddy and India.
    Lots of Love
    Mummy XOXOXOXO


  2. Your and your Mum have expressed the situation perfectly… even Wonder Women have some off days ( and maybe even weeks) and you have been such a wonderful friend and mentor to so many – and us, your friends – you know we are here for the next good and bad days. Onwards and forwards – making the world a better place…

    With a great big hug, Jane


  3. Like a good vinyl, it’s good to understand what speed the music is best heard. Sometimes you just need to put the 12 inch on at 33rpm and kick back. Keep it in the day, sista. X


  4. Hello Brenda

    Great blog. I’m so happy to hear you are listening to your body and slowing down, taking the needed time out. As mommy says there will be ups and downs. You have done so well and embodied strength few of us could reach. We are all so proud of you with your career achievements and how you have handled this setback in your life. You are my super girl! Hugs Linda

    Linda French

    On Mon, Apr 30, 2018, 10:08 AM Brenda won’t back down wrote:

    > brendawontbackdown posted: ” I had originally planned to use Yazz’s ‘The > Only Way is Up’ for this blogpost, however this week it was clear that > Sheryl Crow’s ‘Everyday is a Winding Road’ was more appropriate. Overall, > I’ve had a great couple of weeks. The day before my last chemo ” >


  5. Hi Brenda,
    Great choice of song. Lovely to hear what’s been happening. I remain inspired by your work and think you are a force of nature – although wish I could have hit the fast forward button for you on Tuesday and Wednesday!
    It was wonderful to meet you at Basingstoke on the Well-Being Day.
    All best wishes for the scans then the meeting on Thursday. Awaiting (really hoping for) positive news.
    Lucie xx


  6. You write so well Brenda. When you one day decide to retire from the crazy corporate life you lead I hope you will continue to write your words of wisdom. Wishing you a speedy recovery from the chemo. Jane xx


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